Embracing I’m Asian

This might sound ridiculous, but I have spent the majority of my life fighting the fact that I am in fact South East Asian. Now before you laugh, despite living in a very multi-cultural area, I do reside in North America so this basically means all of my social media is chalked full of beautiful women who have features unlike that of South Eastern and Eastern Asian. They have creases, small, sharp noses, big, colourful eyes; features that have been complimented in my close vicinity many a times. Growing up in the environment I did, never did I hear anybody compliment another person for smaller eyes, a wider nose, a flatter face, so I just grew up disliking these things about myself. My insecurity was not just about my appearance. I did not want to be known as a fob (fresh of the boat). If you had an Asian accent, people would ask you, “What is your name? Ching chong ling long?” Hahahaha haa. Like, what is that suppose to mean? How would you like me to respond? Should I ask, “What is your name? John?” Aha ahaha ah. No, so get a better humour. I didn’t want to tell anyone I liked anime either because there’s this weird misconception that all anime is perverted, like all of it is tentacle hentai or something. PLEASEEEE. Are all American TV shows porn? No, so I’ma just dismiss these accusations. Another thing, I didn’t want to admit. I didn’t want to admit that I enjoy the occasion K-jam and K-drama. Now you might think it’s corny, you might think it’s cheesy, but I love it; it fills my young hormonal heart… My young hormonal heart, yeah. Now you might think Asian men look girly, but I think they’re adorable. If I can respect your personal preferences, surely you can respect mine. (Harp sound effects). In the many months that I have been off of YouTube, I really learned to allow myself to like the things I like. Immersing myself in various Asian cultures has really allowed me to appreciate my appearance, my people, and the cultures ten fold. When I think about it, I got my genes from my parents, and I love my parents, so, if I were to take away my nose, for example, to change it, I would be taking away what my mother gave me and I do not want to do that. If you ever feel un-confident about your ethnicity, PLEASE don’t, because, honest to the forces above, there is something beautiful about every background out there. You can never be too Asian, or not Asian enough, or too White, or not White enough, etc. You don’t need to obsess over your culture, but you don’t need to be shamed or embarrassed either. That is all I have to say about that matter. By the way, I’m Vietnamese, and not Korean or Japanese, but I do love the cultures. I mean, look at their people. I cannot. I can not. Some of you may be wondering why the channel name change to ‘at dawn’ and there’s this random White (-looking) girl in my profile picture with all the attributes that I’ve just talked about that I don’t have, well, HERE SHE IS GUYS! Aha ha. What I’ve decided to do is share my channel with my cousin! Tiffany Noon!~ (laughter) I can’t… So in addition to me making videos by myself of me just talking because I like to talk, we’re also going to make fashion videos, make-up videos, skincare videos, and all this other stuff that I used to do, but now with an extra person. For my style, I am like a split between vintage, and hipster, and Wes Anderson, and she has a very different style from me. What’s your style? Formal/casual, I guess. Why you so unnatural? …I guess? Ahaha, I’m always… (unnatural) Okay, fine, fine. Fine, fine, fine. Or more like business-casual in a way. That’s what’s happening. So yeah. Yeah! Yeah! See ya next time kids! PLEASEEEE. All that other beauty guru sh*t, even– Oh. You’re in it for like 12 seconds, like, I dunno what your– Still Robyn.

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