– Good morrow my fellow Comptonians! I, Schoolboy Reggie,
have called this quest. My big mother is in need of ingredients for her hood-famous cheese grits. We must journey to the Chrenshaw bodega. – But Regginald, there’s a
bodega across the street, is there not? – Yes, but lo big mother
doth owe that bodega $23.74! Who’s with me? – I, Darien, black athlete of
Compton, blue chip prospect stand with thee! – I, Yolanda, drug dealer of the block, and high priestess of
heroin, have got thy back! – And I, Tanisha the thickest, back thine ass up, Okurrr. (upbeat music) – [Reggie] Has anyone
seen Dis’n**** Terrance? – [Derian] My liege, Dis’n****
had made a pact with CP town, lateness and fuckery abound. (mattress thumps)
(men growl) – Halt, corner boys. – We doth sling dope and cut throats! – We shall take thine shit. (yelling) – They’re reachin’ for my air-force ones bestowed to me by my father! – Doth these fools know ’tis my block? – I will draw them hither
with my distracting derriere. Oh hey fellas! – Oh look at the booty, oh, oh, oh! – Hey what’s going on my Nubian princess? – What be her special power again? – [Boy] That that’s a
powerful posterior. (screams) – Oh come here, come here.
– Oh word! (screams) – She’s butt the thickest. – Oh.
– Yeah, ow! – The battle was tough, therefore,
let us take a short rest! – [All] Chronic break! (fire crackles) – Oh yeah.
– Good shit! – Ah ho, over there! A gaggle of thots are upon
us, surely we are done for! – Is you my baby daddy? – Is you my baby daddy? – No!
(footsteps thump) – Sorry I’m late y’all, my
bus caught on fire. (sniffs) Y’all smoke without me? – [All] Dis’n**** Terrance! – The thots, they are retreatin! They see Dis’n**** hath no money! – Oh, he aint ’bout shit, come on baby! (baby cries) – Forsooth, my EBT card
hath been replenished! – [All] ‘Tis the first of the month! – Westward ho, for the cheese grits! – [All] For the cheese grits! (dramatic music) – How did we let this get to market? This game is one of the most
racist things I’ve ever seen, and I went to Duke! – How did we miss this, we’re ruined! – I tried to tell y’all! I sent 285 emails! Look cracker, look! (paper crumples) – Okay, well now, that’s
just a waste of paper! (man screams) (footsteps thump) – We’re blaming that black guy right? – Um, Yeah!!